Oxymora

The other day I was driving down the 55 freeway heading towards a shopping mall called the Triangle Square, when I noticed a white Mercury Sable in the next lane over. (Sable is French for "black.") When I got to the end of the freeway in Costa Mesa, I saw a sign that said, "wanted: clean fill dirt." Then, on the way home, I saw another sign referring to a wildflower garden. I finally pulled into a Wendy's for a hamburger where I noticed that the manager’s "Red Book" is a spiral-bound manual with a green cover.

Just a Word

• backside
• bittersweet
• butthead
• featurette
• reinvent
• spendthrift
• sunshade
• wholesome

Doesn't Compute

• advanced BASIC
• fuzzy logic
• Microsoft Works
• operating system
• virtual reality
• Visual Cobol

Immeasurable

• almost exactly
• first second (of a minute)
• found missing
• loosely packed
• same difference
• second best
• short distance
• 30-minute social hour
• unacceptable solution

High Finance

• banker's trust
• cash surplus
• death benefits
• even odds
• exact estimate
• friendly takeover
• ironclad guarantee
• reciprocal concession
• socialist market economy
• standard deviation
• tax refund

Politically Incorrect

• Central Intelligence Agency
• communist leader
• criminal justice
• European community
• global village
• government organization
• government service
• Great Britain
• house ethics committee
• minor crisis
• modern history
• open secret
• political correctness
• political process
• political science
• politically correct
• resident alien
• temperance party
• United Nations

Life, Liberty, and the Pursuit of Happiness

• alone together
• awfully good
• bad luck
• cardinal sin
• exercise junkie
• happily married
• hopelessly optimistic
• marijuana initiative
• marital bliss
• parents without partners
• safe sex
• science fiction
• serious fun
• sure bet

On the Job

• business ethics
• extensive briefing
• home office
• industrial park
• job security
• liquid paper
• managed competition
• original copy
• paid amateur
• paid volunteer
• paperless ofice
• personalized form letter
• postal service
• postal worker
• press release
• random order
• work party
• worker's lounge
• working vacation

Can't Tune a Fish

• bagpipe music
• light opera
• live recording
• petite grand piano
• pleasant noise
• rap music
• recorded live
• rock opera
• soft rock

The Art of War

• civil war
• clean fight
• disorderly conduct
• fair fight
• firearms safety
• friendly fire
• holy war
• kick boxing
• military intelligence
• near miss
• nuclear safety
• open fist
• passive aggression
• peace force
• peace offensive
• Peacekeeper missile
• practical joke
• rear admiral
• smart bomb
• stand down
• vice admiral
• war games

Fine Dining

• baked Alaska
• dry wine
• evaporated milk
• freezer burn
• fresh frozen
• hot chili
• icy hot
• jumbo shrimp
• natural additives
• nonalcoholic beer
• nondairy creamer
• open face sandwich
• paper china
• plastic silverware
• sweet pickle

Mother Nature

• clean fill dirt
• extinct life
• great depression
• minor miracle
• plastic wood
• routine emergency
• wildflower garden

That's Entertainment

• classic novel
• classically modern
• guest host
• instant classic
• mainstream art film
• talk show
• tragic comedy
• true story
• TV brightness control

Personifications

• Christian Scientist
• Cowardly Lion
• famous Belgians
• foxy chick
• Hell's Angels
• honest crook
• idiot savant
• light heavyweight
• little giant
• male logic
• man child
• noble savage
• non-working mother
• sharp cookie
• skinny broad
• student teacher
• uncrowned king
• understanding wife
• unsung hero

You Don't Say

• act naturally
• American English
• blank expression
• clearly confused
• conspicuous absence
• deafening silence
• definite maybe
• eloquent silence
• include me out
• intense apathy
• mild enthusiasm
• pronounced silence
• silent scream
• sweet sorrow

Now, That's Sick!

• benign cancer
• cold comfort
• ill health
• living dead
• numb feeling
• vaguely aware

On the Move

• California expressway
• down escalator
• fun run
• make haste slowly
• Mobil station
• mobile home
• motorcycle safety
• non-stop flight
• Plymouth Reliant
• race walking
• rolling stop
• rush hour
• safety hazard
• still moving

One Way of Looking At It

• deliberate thoughtlessness
• fairly dark
• feminine logic
• forgotten memories
• free love
• good grief
• highly underestimated
• least favorite
• nothing much
• old news
• only choice
• positively cynical
• preliminary conclusion
• pretty ugly
• real potential
• self-dependent
• simply confusing
• strangely familiar
• terribly nice
• traditionally radical
• unbiased opinion

Breaking the Laws of Physics

• black light
• chaos theory
• constant change
• dynamic equilibrium
• liquid gas
• mild abrasive
• normal deviation

Dressing to Impress

• barely dressed
• healthy tan
• leisure suit
• loose tights
• partial nudity
• tight slacks

And Another Thing

• action figure
• authentic replica
• front end
• genuine imitation
• homeless shelter
• night light
• plastic canvas
• plastic glasses
• removable sticker
• single-store chain
• split level
• steel wool
• still life
• factory-direct antiques